Fuckery.NewsMarshall County High School Shooting
We at humanfuckery.com would like to send our thoughts and prayers to all that have been affected by this senseless act!! We also would like to send our condolences to the two families who lost their loved ones!
source:cbsnews.com
P.E. Teacher Chases Kids Naked On A Playground!!!
Enjoy your new life as a registered sex offender.. There is no excuse for this incident of fuckery, we can only hope that the judge gives this nasty fuck a lengthy prison/jail term!!!
source:losangeles.cbslocal.com
Man Arrested For Throwing Piece Of Chicken At Girlfriend!!!
Excerpt From Article:
The 23-year-old was taken into custody Wednesday night after the dispute at the couple’s home.
According to a police report from the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office, the two were verbally arguing and then Brown “intentionally stepped on her left foot.”
A short time later, the six-foot-two suspect threw the the piece of poultry at the victim, striking her in the left side of her face, and her glasses. The Smoking Gun was the first to report the story.
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This man must of whipped this piece of chicken hard as fuck at her face if this man’s girlfriend called the police!! For more incidents of fuckery involving chicken feel free to check the see also links below!!!
see also:Husband Accused Of Burning Wife With Hot Oil Because Chicken Wasn’t Seasoned!!!
see also:Owner Of Restaurant Assaulted Over Cold Chicken!!!
see also:90 Year Old Lady Shot Over Chicken Bones!!
see also:Man Stabs Gas Station Employee Over Bad Chicken!!
see also:Fuckery Flashback: Ms. Peachez- Fry That Chicken
source:miamiherald.com
Cop Mistakes Pistachio Shells For Weed!!!
Excerpt From Article:
Spring Grove police stopped Pahlman for speeding on Jan. 5, according to a criminal complaint filed in McHenry County court. When an officer mistook the pile of de-shelled pistachios in her passenger seat for marijuana, the officer asked her to step out of the car, said her attorney, Philip Prossnitz.
A search of Pahlman’s car yielded no marijuana, but police found a bottle of the narcotic pain medication tramodol in her coat pocket, according to a motion her attorney filed.
Prossnitz said he now is trying to prove that police did not have a strong enough reason to search Pahlman’s vehicle.
The prescription for the pills was in a family member’s name, although Pahlman does have her own prescription for the medication to help treat chronic pain from fibromyalgia, Prossnitz said.
A year earlier, when Pahlman said she was driving a family member to cancer treatment, the pills fell out of the relative’s bag, and Pahlman put them in her coat pocket for safe keeping, Prossnitz said.
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If a police officer cannot distinguish the difference between pistachio shells and weed it maybe time for this police officer to find a new career.. Hopefully this lady’s lawyer can get this fuckery dismissed!!
source:nwherald.com
200 Meth Tablets Found In Man’s Ass
Excerpt From Article:
Following a tip, police in northern Phayao province searched a local man and found over 200 methamphetamine tablets (yaba) hidden in his rectum.
After conducting a standard body search on Pattapong Chaimongkol, 27, police did not find anything, but after the man continued to act suspicious, police asked him to pull down his underwear.
They found a blue plastic bag stuffed in his bum. Inside were a total of 203 yaba tablets.
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Gotta love people attempting to conceal things in their asses.. This isn’t the first time we’ve seen someone attempting to hide meth or other objects in their orifices….
see also:Florida Woman Hid Meth In ASSHOLE During Jail Booking!!
see also:Sri Lankan Arrested With Nearly 2.2LBS Of Gold In His Ass!!!
see also:Man In India Caught Smuggling 2.65 Pounds Of Gold In His Ass!!
see also:Mint Employee Allegedly Smuggled 180K Worth Of Gold In His ASS!!!
see also:3 Syringes, $20 Bill, And Pills Found In Arkansas Woman’s Pussy!!
source:coconuts.co
5 Arrested After Man Advertises Weed For Sale On Facebook
None of these “drug dealers” would of survived in the no snitchin/talking era of drug dealing… These “dealers” are making everything easy for the cops when they’re advertising their products on social media, last we checked almost every police department in America has a presence on social media!!!! There’s no one to blame but yourselves for being so damn sloppy!!
see also:Deputies Raid Man’s House While He Was Flexin On Facebook Live!!!
source:wric.com
“Ball Slasher” Arrested Again!!
Excerpt From Article:
Christopher Neil Bjerkness, 40, who recently served six months in the Douglas County (Wis.) Jail for destroying exercise balls at two educational facilities, received his latest sentence Thursday in St. Louis County District Court in Duluth.
Bjerkness pleaded guilty in November to a fourth-degree burglary charge stemming from a May incident in which he reportedly entered an Essentia Health facility after hours and caused approximately $200 in damage.
The Duluth Police Department reported that Bjerkness was identified on video entering a closed area of the Polinsky Medical Rehabilitation Center, 530 E. Second St., and destroying an unspecified number of exercise balls just after midnight on May 23.
The Essentia incident was the first in a spree of incidents over two days. Bjerkness previously admitted in Douglas County Circuit Court to slashing exercise balls at both the Superior High School and the University of Wisconsin-Superior on May 24.
Bjerkness was caught in the act early that morning at the high school, where he popped at least 20 exercise balls valued at $40 apiece. UWS officials later discovered at least 10 exercise balls that were slashed in the dance studio at the campus wellness center, with surveillance video showing that Bjerkness had entered the facility about an hour before he was arrested at the high school.
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This story is just flat out bizarre. One thing we are wondering is if this man has a full fledged hard on when he’s slashing these balls… What a head scratcher!!!
source:twincities.com
Satanic Ritual Preformed On Unsuspecting Woman!!!
Due To The Length Of Article We’ve Decided To Repost:
A North Huntingdon man is accused of performing what he called a “Satanic ritual” on a female friend by using a razor blade to cut her right palm and then repeatedly cutting her leg, police said.
Kyle A. Parker, 21, of Brownstown Road, Larimer, allegedly cut the woman during a heated argument at his residence at 5 p.m. Jan. 10, police said in an affidavit.
The victim passed out after her palm was cut and awoke to find she had repeated razor cuts around the calf of one leg, police said. She was taken from Parker’s residence by a female friend, police said.
The victim told police that when she attempted to pick up her vehicle from Parker’s home the following day, he allegedly told her, “I sold your soul to the devil.”
Police did not say if the victim needed medical treatment for the razor cuts.
Parker was charged with simple assault and harassment before North Huntingdon District Judge Wayne Gongaware and placed in the Westmoreland County Prison in lieu of $75,000 bond.
He faces a preliminary hearing before Gongaware on Wednesday.
In 2006, Parker was sentenced to serve up to two years in jail for shooting his roommate in the chest with a sawed-off .22-caliber rifle and stealing money and Christmas gifts from eight other victims.
Parker told Westmoreland County Judge Christopher Feliciani the shooting was an accident.
As per terms of a plea agreement, Feliciani sentenced Parker to 11½ to 23 months in the county prison, followed by three years of probation. He was ordered to get drug and alcohol treatment and to make restitution.
Police said Parker was showing off his altered .22-caliber rifle when it accidently fired Dec. 29, 2014, critically injuring his then-roommate, Anthony Venturella, 23, in Parker’s mother’s home on Brownstown Road.
The restitution includes at least $54,000 to cover the victim’s medical bills, Feliciani said.
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The devil and his demons aren’t nothing to play with.. Nothing much more to say about this fuckery… Moving on!!!
source:triblive.com
Man Blames Burning Down House On Brother Farting In His Face!!!
This has to be one of the strangest cases of arson we’ve ever came across!!! Nothing much more to say about this fuckery, this fuckery speaks for itself!!!
source:kimatv.com
Man Allegedly Punches Himself In The Face To Avoid Breathalyzer
Man Allegedly Punches Himself In The Face To Avoid Breathalyzer
Due To The Articles Length We’ve Decided To Repost:
BELFAST, Maine (WGME) – Belfast police say they have arrested a man who allegedly punched himself in the face to avoid a breathalyzer test.
Police say they found the car of 27-year-old Brian Fogg in a ditch early Saturday morning on Waterville Road.
When they tried to administer a breathalyzer test, Fogg allegedly punched himself in the face three times, causing himself to bleed.
Police tended to his injuries instead of giving him the test.
Fogg is charged with OUI, falsifying physical evidence and criminal mischief.
He has since been released on bail.
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Please let there be footage of this fuckery!!!! PLEASE,PLEASE, PLEASE!!!!!
source:wwgme.com
Tampa Man Mistakes Bank Of America Drive-Through For Taco Bell, Gets DUI
Florida Man Mistakes Bank Of America Drive Thru For Taco Bell, Receives DUI
Excerpt From Article:
The branch manager of the Mariner Boulevard bank said they saw Douglas Jon Francisco passed out in his blue Hyundai sedan while it sat in the drive-up bank lane, according to the Hernando County Sheriff’s Office. This was about 5 p.m. on Wednesday.
The manager said they started banging on the Hyundai’s window “for some time,” according a deputy’s report, before Francisco finally woke up.
Then Francisco tried to order a burrito, deputies said. When Claussen told he was not, in fact, at a Taco Bell, deputies said he drove to the front parking lot. When deputies arrived, they said they found Francisco in the driver’s seat, the car still running.
“He made several statements that were differing from reality,” a deputy wrote in the arrest report.
He also denied asking the manager for a burrito. Deputies said his responses to their questions were delayed and that after a field sobriety test he appeared to be impaired. Deputies said Francisco also had prescription medication with him under his name.
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We’re glad that this man didn’t harm himself or anyone else for that matter. This incident of fuckery could of ended a lot worse than it did!!
source:tampabay.com